2 Opinions Can Mean Argument, Engage Screenagers With Wisdom

Dr Warren LINGER Engaged Screenager

2 Opinions Can Mean Argument, Engage Screenagers With Wisdom

One of my favorite sayings that comes about from coaching is, “2 opinions can mean an argument, wisdom is floating above the argument, like the sun shining light on has not been said. By listening the sun enlightens what hasn’t been said like: fears, come froms, blind spots, limiting beliefs, and and sticking points.
Are you striving for wisdom to show caring when you engage your Screenagers?
I just read an article from Corinne Sweet saying we are all Screenagers, and because I agree, going forward when I talk about Screenagers, I’m talking about teenagers and anyone else with a screen who is important in your life.
I am going to make a bold statement.
If there are 2 opinions in a disagreement, those opinions are not fully looking, listening, or feeling, from above like the sun, to highlight the deeper hidden issues for better understanding.


As Dale Carnegie says, “The only way to get the best of an argument is by avoiding it.”
I’m not saying a difference of opinion and debate are not good to raise intellectual understanding. They are, of course, wonderful in that purposeful context.
Engage and support your Screenagers’ different opinions to learn from them.
When the learning slows, rise to wisdom with your Screenagers, not above them. Here are a few areas of focus I use as a trainer and coach to take people to the next level.
Remember though, some of these focus areas may overlap.
Rise to wisdom:
  • Listen to their heart.
  • Listen for limiting beliefs
  • Listen for sticking points
  • Listen for blind spots
  • Listen for fears
  • Listen for “come froms”
Over and over I hear discussions, in my seminars and with my clients, of how people tried and tried but they couldn’t listen to their Screenagers well. After a few questions it normally comes out they have tried fewer than 4 times before they have given up. Isn’t your screenager worth more than that?

DrWarren presenting from an Engaging Screenager Interactive eWorkbook
DrWarren presenting from an Engaging Screenager Interactive eWorkbook








I remember a client (a Human Resources professional) once told me of his struggles working with one person in his Information Technology department of his company.
The IT person was assigned as support person for HR and every time they talked it turned into an argument.
Being a strong “people” person, when my client looked at the problem he felt upset even thinking about talking or listening to the IT guy. This is junk-engagement thinking.
Because left unfixed, little problems like this can drain an organization of energy, so my client began to practice and rehearse with other colleagues, with me with family members, and with friends.
After a few months things began to improve, and after a few more months the environment was better. I’m not saying they are best friends, but they do work well together. Now they are working in high value engagement.
So you ask, “How long does it take?” My answer is, “it takes as long as it takes.”
In my dissertation research I mentioned a study from the Berlin School of Music that talked about the 10000 hour rule where we need to engage in an activity (not watching TV) practice, rehearsal, and performance before we can achieve mastery.
In his book, Outliers, Malcolm Gladwell talks about this 10000 hour rule and mentions that achievement is not only talent, but also preparation.
It’s interesting how the most successful people I know are continually learning, developing, and growing.
The people who are not successful are rarely learning, developing, and growing.
In all of my training, coaching, mentoring, and consulting, I focus on problem solving to improve, and I do this not to solve the problem, but to monitor and improve the problem solving knowledge, skills, and confidence.
This blog is about making life just a little bit better.
Right now, from your new “wisdom point of view” what could you improve to make your life a little bit better?

Keep improving on your rise to wisdom, you are successful.

You can see examples of screen innovations for Optimal Experiences at JOIN THE CURATION: Google+.
Remember to engage tomorrow.
Following you then.
Keep it simple.
All the Best, Warren
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Dr Warren LINGER © 2017

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